"Doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith. We must never allow doubt to hold us prisoner and keep us from the divine love, peace and gifts that come through faith in the Lord Jesus Christ."
Sorry that I forgot to tell you all last week that my preparation day got switch to Wednesday this week, it is because we are going to the temple today!!! I am so excited. I feel like so much has happened in these past 10 days and my faith has been really tested by the Lord.
Elvira is doing so awesome. We finished teaching her the lessons last week, and everything turned out so much better then we thought. One of the last lessons we taught her was on tithing, both Sister Hatch and I were nervous about how it would go. She is still paying off medical bills from when her husband passed away from cancer a few years ago, she is a single parent providing for her two teenage children. We thought that this was going to be a hard one for her to accept and it would really be a trial of her faith. We had set up the appointment with her for last Saturday and we had invited her coworker that introduced her to the gospel. Even though he lives out in Eagle we thought it would be the best because they have a good relationship and she really respects him. Well when we pulled up to her house my heart just dropped because her car was gone. My companion said not to worry and just to wait, but I had this feeling that we just had to call her. So I kind of disregarded what my companion said and called her, she was at her friends house and had forgotten about our appointment. She was wanting to cancel, but I reminded her how Jackson(her friend) was coming out for the lesson. She thought for a few seconds and then said that she would be there in ten minutes. Let me tell you Satan has been working hard on us. Anyway so we had the lesson with her and it went so well and two of her coworkers were there and just testified about the blessings that tithing would bring to her. She agreed to live the law of tithing and asked us if she could start paying it tomorrow at church. I couldn't believe it, that was the first time that I have ever taught that lesson before and the investigator wanted to start paying it right away. We got to see her on Monday and watched the restoration video with her, we really have been trying to keep in contact with her and strengthen her testimony. We were hoping to see her yesterday and this morning but she got called into work early, she has been working like 10-12 hour days these last few days, Satan is not wanting her to meet with us I can tell you that. But she called us this morning and asked us if we could come over tonight and when we told her we could she was so excited. I love this woman so much, the faith that she has inspires me, she makes me want to be a better person. I feel so blessed to of been able to teach her, she was so prepared by the Lord. So we were talking to her about her baptismal program and who she wanted to do what stuff. She works with a Doctor Packer and has grown really close with him, he is a Stake President in another Stake, he actually called her when he found out that she was getting baptized. She asked him to give a talk at her Baptism and he agreed. We found out from Jackson(her co-worker) that Doctor Packer is President Packers grandson!!!! That is so crazy, I don't think she realizes that either. When we told him that he would be speaking he was shocked and grateful, he is well respected at the hospital. She is so ready for this Saturday and I am so excited for her, i know that it is going to be such an amazing experience.
So update on Charlie. So we really have been shooting for her to be baptized on the 28th, but we had been waiting to hear back from his brother in law to see when he could come up to do the baptism. On Sunday when we saw him he told us that his brother in law would not be able to come up till the 12th of July, we were a little sad to here this but he said it wasn't for sure. On Monday night we went to his house to teach us a lesson. When we showed up, he told us that he had to cancel because his wife had a rough day and she was napping. Then he continue to tell us that he didn't think that he was going to get Baptized till August because his sister in law wanted him to wait until the family reunion. My heart just dropped. He has been meeting with missionaries for 6 years and he has had so many baptismal dates. We didn't understand why he was getting cold feet, he tried to assure us that it was going to happen, but we told him how he has said this before in the past when he has pushed off his baptismal date. We told him we didn't understand because when we told him about the blessings he could bring to his family he was so gun-ho about being baptized at the end of June. We talked to him about the blessings he would be putting off until August for his family and how if he was baptized next weekend, he would be able to baptize his daughter with all the cousins(Bishop was the one who told us that). That really made him think, he said he would think things over and let us know but we haven't heard from him yet. It is so hard to convey to people the importance of Baptism on their doorstep.
I was heart broken and devastated when we got this news. I didn't understand, I had so much Faith that this would happen. Sister Hatch and I have been doing everything that we could for this ward that we are in to see the fruits of the Boise Missions June Harvest(for ever ward to have a baptism by the end of June). (Elvira actually lives in another ward boundary but we have been teaching her because she is single and felt more comfortable with sisters teaching her.) I felt like I had failed the ward, that all my efforts had gone to waste and that I had put all of our marbles in Charlies basket. My mission President was right when he told us at the beginning of the month that Satan would be doing all he could to waver our faith and to disappointment. I still have hope for Charlie, but it isn't as much as it was before we saw him Monday.
The Lord showed me though that when one door closes another one opens. This was a miracle within itself and the timing was a miracle! So there is a man in our ward who lost his wife last year and there has been this big controversy in his family because he was wanting to get remarried to one of his old friends from high school. Well about a week ago he went down to Texas to get married and moved her up to his house. We went to go help them move boxes in and to unpack, we came to find out that Mary(his new wife) was meeting with missionaries down in Texas and had been going to church since February. We asked her if she would like to continue to take the lessons and she agreed to it and she has been coming to church up here. So last week we had set up an appointment with her for yesterday(Tuesday). We went and retaught her the Restoration. Sister Hatch and I decided to take a leap of Faith and asked her if she would be baptized on the 28th of June, and she said yes!!! She was so excited, I seriously could not believe it. I am still in shock! I know that we can get her ready by that day. I have been going back and forth these past 24 hours trying to figure out if I am pushing this because I am wanting our ward to see the fruits of the June Harvest or if she truly is just ready and a miracle that the Lord has placed into my path. I just don't think I am use to this when teaching people. I am so use to teaching people everything about the gospel and then finding out what their concerns are about baptism, not the other way around where they want to get baptized before they fully know everything. I still have my hopes for Charlie for the 28th, but I am still so amazed at how the Lord is involved in every detail of the work.
I cannot believe that it is already transfers coming up in just over a week! Where has the time gone. This week when we were talking to our bishop it really hit me that it is about 90% that I will be the one to go. I started to cry because I have grown such a deep love for these people here in this area, the members and my investigators. It was such a struggle for me at first and I just wanted to be transferred out the first transfer but these last two I have really come to see and love the people how God does. It is because I have worked so closely with the Bishop and created a relationship with him that I have seen how much he cares about everyone and loves everyone that it rubbed off onto me. If I could have my way, I would want to serve in this area for the rest of my mission. I don't want to leave these people! The Lord has really opened my eyes in this area and pushed me. My faith has been really tried these last few weeks, but I am all in on the Lord's side. I look back at the last few days and feel silly for doubting my faith. I didn't understand how Charlie could fall through when I had given it my all, when I had so much Faith and did everything that the Lord asked me to do. "Sometimes we don't see the big picture when we are standing in the frame(right Nathan?)" That is what I need to do better at is trusting in the Lord in what he is doing not only with my investigators, but with myself. He is the one that sees the big picture and although sometimes we don't understand why He is taking us down the path that we are going down, but we have to be patient and have faith in Him. In the end His way is always better.
So for the past few weeks I have been really studying the Atonement, it has made such a difference in my life and has really opened my eyes to everything. I have come to realize that in any relationship that when you spend time with someone more and get to know them a little better that you come to love them a little more a little deeper. That is something that I have realized on my mission. That as I have come to know my Savior a little more that I have come to love Him even more. And that since I have been out on my mission,Heavenly Father and Christ have been showing me just how much they really know me. This has been the only time in my life where in a sense I am taking the time to "spend" with my Father in Heaven and my Savior. My relationship with them has strengthen, we have walked side by side in a sense. Each time I study the Gospel and the Atonement I realize just how much They love me which in returns deepens my love for Them. I can't not express how grateful I am for the things that I have learned thus far.
My challenge for all of you this week is to think about your relationship with your Savior and think about what you can do to strengthen that. Study about his life a little more, ask him for miracles in your life. I read this talk the other week by Jeffery R. Holland(seriously my favorite), and I feel his words explained it perfectly. Each day i want to strengthen my relationship with both God and Jesus Christ every single day so when I make it to the next life I will be able to recognize their faces even though I have never seen them. I love you all so much!!!!
"When (Christ) comes, I so want to be caught living the gospel. I want to be surprised right in the act of spreading the faith and doing something good. I want the Savior to say to me: “(insert name here), I recognize you not by your title but by your life, the way you are trying to live and the standards you are trying to defend. I see the integrity of your heart. I know you have tried to make things better first and foremost by being better yourself and then by declaring my word and defending my gospel to others in the most compassionate way you could.”He will certainly add: “I know you weren’t always successful with your own sins and with the circumstances of others, but I believe you honestly tried. I believe in your heart you truly loved me.”
LoveSister Metcalf
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